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Kim Kardashian recently shared that since her split with Pete Davidson, she’s “happily single.” She also shared that she hasn’t really thought about her next relationship because she isn’t trying to rush into anything and wants to focus on her own life.
She explained, “I haven’t really thought about it, because I’m not looking. I just want to chill for a minute. I think I need some time to myself and to focus, finish school, all that. But I think my next route, I feel like I have to … go to different places. Clearly, it’s not working, whatever I’m doing.”
Selena Gomez talked to the Zach Sang Show about being single for years: “I’ve been super, super single for two years, and I want to know what the love will look like next for me. I want it to be real, and I don’t want it to be codependent or messy or [have] a lack of communication.”
She also spoke to Vogue about love in general and shared that being in the spotlight has made her wary of new relationships that come into her life. She said, “[The Wizards of Waverly Place cast] were there before any of it. They loved me for me, and they still do. I can’t say that I have that anymore. I can’t meet someone and know if they like me for me. To be honest, I just want to start over. I want everything to be brand-new. I want someone to love me like I’m brand-new.”
In 2016, Jennifer Aniston wrote an essay for HuffPost in which she talked about how society defines women by their marital and maternal status.
She wrote, “Here’s where I come out on this topic: we are complete with or without a mate, with or without a child. We get to decide for ourselves what is beautiful when it comes to our bodies. That decision is ours and ours alone. Let’s make that decision for ourselves and for the young women in this world who look to us as examples. Let’s make that decision consciously, outside of the tabloid noise. We don’t need to be married or mothers to be complete. We get to determine our own ‘happily ever after’ for ourselves.”
Tracee Ellis Ross has said that she’s “happily single” and added, “That doesn’t mean I am not open to and don’t want a relationship. But in my wonderful and robust experience of being single, I have learned to have a productive relationship with loneliness and an intensely juicy relationship with my joyful solitude — I really enjoy my company.”
She also talked about how important it is to spend quality time with yourself because it helps build a better, more self-loving relationship. She said, “For example, one of the things I loved to do prepandemic is put on something cute and go for dinner and have a beautiful meal and a glass of wine. Well, can’t do that. But you know what? I can do that at home. I make a beautiful plate. I set it out and have a glorious meal. I make my bed every morning. One of the things that’s been lovely to discover is how I care for myself and how I actively love myself. And I believe that love is an action: You get back what you put in.”
Emma Watson said she faced an “incredible amount of anxiety” when she turned 30 because she had so many ideas about how her life was supposed to look at that age.
She told Vogue, “If you have not built a home, if you do not have a husband, if you do not have a baby, and you are turning 30 and you’re not in some incredibly secure, stable place in your career, or you’re still figuring things out … there’s just this incredible amount of anxiety.”
She also explained, “I never believed the whole ‘I’m happy single’ spiel. I was like, ‘This is totally spiel.’ It took me a long time, but I’m very happy. I call it being self-partnered.”
When Emilia Clarke was once asked if she was dating someone, she responded, “People keep asking me who I’m dating right now, and the truth is…wait for [it]…no one.”
She continued, “And that’s okay. I’m figuring out a lot of stuff right now. I think as a woman, it’s in our nature to nurture someone else. Sometimes at the expense of ourselves.”
Mindy Kaling has shared that she does date, but her busy schedule doesn’t always allow for men to be a top priority. She explained, “When I was younger, I wanted so badly to be married and have kids in a rush. I loved my parents’ relationship. The way my father was with my mother when she was dying was so moving. It was such devotion. I don’t know that that will happen for me, but I like it.”
She added that she is happy with her life the way it is, saying, “I don’t need marriage. I don’t need anyone to take care of all my needs and desires. I can take care of them myself now.”
She’s also commented several times about the speculation that she and B.J. Novak are together or that he’s the father of her children, saying, “He’s the godparent to both my kids — and they have such a great relationship — and so far [the speculation hasn’t] affected my happiness at alll; it hasn’t affected my kids or B.J.”
Last year, Lil Nas X revealed to the Wall Street Journal that he wasn’t actively trying to date someone at the moment because he’d just gotten out of a relationship and wanted to focus on his career.
He said, “At the end of the day, I want to exist. I want to have fun, I want to cause chaos sometimes. I want a long, legendary, fun life.”
Before getting married, Salma Hayek once told Oprah, “Women have been taught that in order to have a place in the world, an identity, they must marry and have children. If that’s the life you truly want, great. But for many women, marriage is only about needing the world to know that someone desires them enough to say, ‘Here’s a contract to prove that I love you and will commit to you for the rest of my life.’ For these women, no contract equals no validation — and, thus, no reason for existing.”
She continued, “It’s nice to have a relationship, but women have become addicted. You can have a relationship with God. With nature. With dogs. With yourself. And yes, you can also have a relationship with a man, but if it’s going to be a shitty one, it’s better to have a relationship with your flowers.”
In an interview with People magazine, Teri Hatcher said, “Many women who get divorced will not get remarried. That kind of sounds depressing, but it doesn’t have to be.”
She continued to say that she’s content with being single: “Many women are not just surviving alone, they’re thriving. They’re empowered, they’re making money, they’re being healthy, they’re traveling. You are allowed to be proud of your life when you’re not part of a couple.”
Back in 2019, Charlize Theron told Glamour that she prefers being single. She said, “I haven’t been in a relationship for a very long time. I never wanted to get married.”
She added, “Those are things that are not hard for me because they’re innately my truth. I find people are somewhat perplexed by that, and also more with women, right?”
In her memoir Wildflower, Drew Barrymore talked about how society often views being single as a “malady” that needs to be cured. She wrote, “It’s ironic that we rush through being ‘single’ as if it’s some disease or malady to get rid of or overcome.”
She also added this hard pill to swallow: “The truth is, most likely, one day you will meet someone and it will be gone. And once it’s gone, it’s really gone! Why does no one tell us how important it is to enjoy being single and being by yourself?”
Drew also told Parade, “Sexual love is secondary to me right now. I’ve spent a lot of time in my life dedicating myself to love or the pursuit of love or the understanding of love. But for the last few years, my life just hasn’t been about that for me. It’s just not about the mother baggage. It’s not about the boy. It’s about something completely different, and it’s very refreshing. I’m trying to understand it and relish it.”
January Jones said that while she isn’t publicly in a relationship, she doesn’t feel “unhappy” or “lonely.” She added that she would “maybe” want a partner but doesn’t need one.
She also explained that if she were to let a romantic partner into her life, “it would have to be someone so amazing that I would want to make room. Someone who would contribute to my happiness and not take away from it.”
When Susan Sarandon was asked about her split from Tim Robbins, she said, “[Single life has] been a lot of different things. It’s traumatic and exhilarating. The one thing that’s been really clear to me is that you have to think of your own life and your relationship and everything as a living organism. It’s constantly moving, changing, growing. I think long-term relationships need to be constantly reevaluated and talked about.”
She also said that her breakup was an opportunity to grow: “Of course you feel like a failure. It’s a big deal, but again, it’s an opportunity to grow. At the end of my first marriage [in 1979 to Chris Sarandon], it was about the loss of ideal, about who you thought this person was. I thought love conquered all, and I had to reevaluate everything. And you need your girlfriends, you need to take long, long walks until you’re exhausted and no longer freaking out, and you hold on until a new dawn. Then you get another chance.”
In regards to hookup culture, she prefers to have a connection with someone. She said, “It’s the connection that’s important, I think, as a woman. I love sex, but sex without connection for me is not interesting. When a guy says, ‘It was nothing, it was just sex,’ I believe that’s true for him. It doesn’t work that way for me. I could have just sex, but I’m interested in connection.”
Years ago, Taylor Swift told E! News that she had become “very protective” of her happiness after some not-so-great relationships. She added, “I found a place in my life that feels really great, and I’m not willing to compromise that for just anyone, and so, you can paraphrase that all you want into something very extreme, but they make what I say extreme no matter what I say.”
She continued, “So I’m really happy about the fact that being single doesn’t feel like being alone. I have love in my life; I just don’t have a relationship, and that feels really natural right now.”
Diane Keaton once said that the “old maid myth is garbage” because her life hasn’t been any less full without a spouse. She added, “I remember when I was young, I honestly believed in some ridiculous way that you would find someone who would be the person you lived with until you died. I don’t think that, because I’m not married, it’s made my life any less.”
She also shared that she had a specific idea of what a relationship should be, but that perspective has changed throughout the years. She said, “I had some insane idea that I had to be in love. Now I see what it really takes: real consideration that you’re a good team together.”
Allison Janney told Drew Barrymore that she’s more than happy to find someone to “spend her life with,” but she’s also not worried if it doesn’t end up happening. She said, “I really am at this time in my life getting to know who I am and what I want. So I’d love to eventually find someone to share my life with, but if it doesn’t happen, I think I’ll be just fine.”
She added that she was never sure she wanted kids, and doesn’t regret not having any. She added, “I wasn’t ever really confident that I wanted to have kids, and I would rather regret not having kids than have kids and regret it.”
Stevie Nicks candidly said that she feels most women probably wouldn’t be happy living her life, but she doesn’t mind being alone. She said, “People say, ‘But you’re alone.’ But I don’t feel alone. I feel very un-alone. I feel very sparkly and excited about everything. I know women who are going, like, ‘I don’t want to grow old alone.’ And I’m like, ‘See, that doesn’t scare me.’ Because I’ll never be alone. I’ll always be surrounded by people. I’m like the crystal ball, and these are all the rings of Saturn around me.”
She added, “My generation fought very hard for feminism, and we fought very hard to not be labeled as you had to have a husband or you had to be in a relationship, or you were somehow not a cool chick. And now I’m seeing that start to come around again, where people say to you, ‘Well, what do you mean, you don’t have a boyfriend? You don’t want to have one? You don’t want to be married?’ And you’re like, ‘Well, no, I don’t, actually. I’m fine.’ And they find a lot of reasons why you’re not fine. But it just seems to be coming back. Being able to take care of myself is something that my mom really instilled in me. I can remember her always saying, ‘If nothing else, I will teach you to be independent.’”
In 2017, Jenny Slate told Vanity Fair that she hadn’t been in a relationship for a while and that it gave her time to take care of her own well-being. She said, “This is the first time in my adult life that I haven’t been in a relationship, that I’m just all alone, and I do whatever I like to do.”
She added, “I’m a person who also likes to keep an eye on my mental health and my body health. I’ve treated myself nicely.”
Back in 2015, Rihanna spoke to the New York Times about how she was still waiting for men not to be threatened by her power, and said she wouldn’t give them the attention their egos craved.
She said, “Guys need attention. They need that nourishment, that little stroke of the ego that gets them by, every now and then. I’ll give it to my family, I’ll give it to my work — but I will not give it to a man right now.”
Finally, Lucy Hale once told Cosmopolitan about how she felt that she always needed to be dating. She said, “When I was younger, I was constantly wanting to be with or date someone because I was so deathly afraid of being single or by myself.”
But now, as the years have gone by, she’s come to cherish being single and living her life on her own terms. She added, “Now I’m at the point where, if I meet someone, they better really elevate my life, because I love being single.”
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